The World Wide Web came to my rescue and offered up various 5-star-reviewed ways to substitute for a bottle of this and a bottle of that. Here are the results, approved by my family (actually, the children would prefer it a little less spicy, but this way there's more for my Farmer and me):
Spicy Chicken Dip
1 1/2 pint cooked chicken (about a pound; I used breast meat)
2 8-oz. packages of neufchatel (low-fat cream cheese)
1 1/2 cup shredded cheddar
1/2 cup yogurt
1/4 cup milk
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/4 tsp. each dried parsley and dill
1/4 cup minced onion
2 T Tabasco chipotle hot sauce (or to taste)
6 shakes of powdered cayenne (1/4 tsp?)
Mix it all up gently, heat in a saucepan or in the oven till bubbly, say, 30 minutes on medium-low, or 300F. Traditionally served with celery, but also delicious with crackers or by the spoonful. [note: once it was heated, I sprinkled more shredded cheddar on top for looks]
(and a photo, for Little Sister, who pinned it)

